Why Self-Reliance is Crucial in Relationships

If you’re in a relationship and you’re looking for a way to be happier and to ensure you stand the test of time, one of the single most important things to consider is just how self-reliant you each are. The point here is that the couples that are happiest apart are the couples who are happiest together.

But what precisely does this mean? And why on Earth should being happy to get away from someone actually help you to be happier when you’re with them?

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

Sometimes you see couples who do absolutely everything together and who are completely reliant on one another. They go on holiday together, they share friends and they meet up for lunch on their breaks at work. From the outside, this might seem like the perfect situation and you might even imagine that it’s a sign of a healthy relationship – but actually, the opposite is true.

For starters, when a couple feels as though they must go absolutely everywhere together and do everything together, it leaves them with very little to talk about and very little time to miss each other. Normally, when something exciting happens at work, you look forward to rushing home to tell your partner. If they already know though and you already know everything they got up to… how do you go about making conversations? It’s couples like these that end up relying on weddings and children to fuel their conversation and then are left with nothing to say.

At the same time, a lack of time apart means that neither of you has time to grow and develop your own lives. This is particularly dangerous in case you do than break up in which case you can be left without any friends or any interests to distract you.

Finally, self-reliance and independence in relationships prevent either of you from becoming resentful of the other. What happens when one of you wants to do something the other one doesn’t? Do you drag your partner along with you and make them unhappy? Or do you neglect to do that thing altogether and leave yourself feeling resentful – like they’re dragging you down and destroying your dreams?

Being in a relationship is wonderful and it’s great to get to know someone so well and grow together. Just make sure you keep growing as individuals too and you maintain your self-reliance!